I have travelled both inner and outer worlds seeking freedom, truth, myself, wisdom, love, the name changed but not the search. Until eventually I came home and began to find myself. Though this turned out to be nothing like what I had wanted or thought it should be.
Along the way, besides this bus trip to India, I have lived on a eco-farm, in a spiritual community, off-grid in Wales and in many different countries. I have worked as a gardener, cleaner, NHS manager, therapeutic body-worker, and knitter of beautiful blankets (which I was useless at selling). I have declared myself enlightened after imagining I had transcended myself before falling off the top of that mountain right back down into the dark valleys of my humanity. I have played and experimented with a group of musicians and singers, taken off to live up a wild mountain in rural Spain and returned, reluctantly, to the UK where I thought I had to meet the ‘real world’ and opened a shop that sold beautiful and unusual items but never made much money – yet again. I now live in Cumbria with my wife and partner through most of the above adventures, where I grow fruit and veg and keep bees – though not to steal their honey, to take care of them and for their vital role in pollinating plants.
All through my journeys I have known the struggles and delights of a deep and intimate relationship with my wife, with community, friends and the world. I have had to meet everything I was afraid of, my rage, fear, despair, sadness and ordinariness, and the heartbreak at the death of my stepson. Yet I have found what I was seeking, ultimately my love for my wife, for simplicity, for ordinariness, for nature, for life itself, and even for my imperfect human reality.
And the journey continues….